Live Beyond Stress and Illness

The following meditation offers a blend of nourishing techniques to support the release of anxiety, shock and trauma. We begin with a body scan meditation, bringing our awareness to the different parts of the body and sending gentle intentional thoughts to relax and let go. The body scan supports us in consciously quieting the mind, relaxing the body, and building a greater sense of rapport and faith in ourselves to communicate harmoniously with our body. Then we ease into a meditation pose that nourishes the Heart and Small Intestine energies of the body which express an imbalance through anxiety, shock, and trauma. We will also be integrating affirmations related to the qualities and experiences that become abundant to us when these energies are healthy and harmonized.

A balanced expression of Heart and Small Intestine energies reflect an active, open and vital expression of the self--An expression that reflects free-flowing joy for the creativity of life and the beauty in the world around us. The body is free from armoring, anxiety, heart palpitations, restless sleep, chaotic thinking, sadness and exhaustion.

It is said that the Small Intestines are the place where disease becomes manifest, and so consider this meditation whenever there is a sense of emotional and physical imbalance in the body.

Releasing Anxiety, Shock, and Trauma (27minutes)

This is the time of year of year when we all find ourselves contemplating new goals and creating action plans for our success. This is a time when we examine our past, our successes and failures, and dream of greater opportunities in the New Year.

Fear will always be the number one obstacle holding any of us back from living our greatness. And because fear can be so clever in keeping us from what we want most in our lives I've created a visioning meditation to promote a deepened understanding of our relationship with fear and to support us in gently awakening the fearless self that lives within each one of us.

So kick your shoes off...find a quiet zone for yourself to escape to for awhile and let me take you on a guided journey into your Fearless Self.

Here’s to reaching your goals in 2009!
Diana Bertoldo

Awakening Your Fearless Self (23minutes)

Companion Journal- Awakening Your Fearless Self

After you've completed this meditation feel free to deepen your experience with Your personal copy of the Awaken Your Fearless Self Journal. You can download it here: http://www.scribd.com/share/upload/8250982/1ew7jpzq3mkxd0rt5i07

The news of illness can be caked with fear. And for many people there can be a sense of wanting to flee the body. Yet this is the time to deepen your relationship with your body. It’s the time for you and your body to become an allied force that works together to promote health, well being, and peace. The following are 5 tips to help you create an allied force between you and your body.

Forgive Your Body: It’s easy to feel betrayed by your body when illness enters into the picture. But the wedge of un-forgiveness you create between you and your body will keep you from working together towards peace, health and well-being. When you forgive your body much of the emotional, mental and physical resistance you experience with illness melts away—leaving you a more favorable environment to manage illness.

Forgive Yourself: Whatever it is that you believe you should or shouldn’t have done to keep your illness at bay—let it go! Take responsibility for the here and now and forgive yourself for any part you may believe you played in having this illness. It’s easy to get lost in thoughts like, “Why me?” and “How could I have prevented this?” Some people even believe they must have deserved their illness. This kind of thinking places a wedge of un-forgiveness between you and your body. Whatever it takes, forgive yourself so you can melt away the emotional, mental and physical turmoil that keeps you from creating an internal environment for yourself that promotes health and well being.

Listen to Your body: Now is the time to listen like you’ve never listened before. And this may feel like quite a role reversal at first since you are probably better practiced in telling the body what to do vs. listening to the body as it tells you what it needs, what it wants, and how you can help. Listening to the body involves a willingness to let the body inform and direct you. And if you can get past the initial feeling of being demoted to a position that might entail more listening than telling than you will likely appreciate the direction in which your body takes you. Remember, your body knows a thing or two about what it needs to heal…so listen.

Practice Gratitude: Remember to bring your awareness to all the amazing things your body does for you. Focus on what is working—all the systems, organs, and cells in the body that have been working dedicated 24/7 shifts for as long as you can remember. Appreciate all the ways the body takes care of you. Acknowledge all the wonderful emotional, mental and physical journeys this body takes you through. Remember the ways it has fought illness in the past and won! Be grateful for the ways it alerts you of danger and the ways it fills you with pleasure with so many of the things you do. Express gratitude towards your body as you would a dear friend.

Nurture Your Body Daily: Why wait for your body to ask for what it needs when you can give it what it deserves daily. Make time for daily habits that nurture and nourish your body. Reward your body with quiet time where it can relax, restore and renew. Create the opportunity every day to pamper your body as a way of letting it know you appreciate it’s hard work, you’re glad it’s on your team, and you want to do everything you possibly can to support your body and this alliance between you.

It’s easy to lose sight of the good things in your life when you feel threatened by illness. The uncertainty and fear can steel your ability to see the parts of your life that are truly blessed, wonderful, and in order. Facing a serious illness can feel a lot like the car wreck on the side of the road you just can’t take your eyes off. There you stand frozen, stunned, and mesmerized with fear biting at your hopeful anticipation for everyone to make it out alive.

Expand Your Focus:

It’s natural to experience a sense of unrelenting fear with your illness. Yet it’s important to remember that you must move yourself beyond it. Easing stress and fear is one of the most powerful ways you can support your health and well being. In order to do that you’ll need to broaden your focus to include all the support systems and favorable circumstances that are working in your life. You’ll need to become more aware of the powerful resources and support already in place for you and consciously create more of what you need to dissolve your fears.

Acknowledge The Ways Your Body Supports You:

Even though you may be experiencing physical symptoms from your illness, remember to acknowledge the parts of your body that are free from symptoms and even free from illness. Bring your attention and appreciation to all the systems and functions of the body that are performing well and contributing to your health and quality of life. Acknowledge all the things your body is supporting you in doing, being, and having.

Sometimes it can be helpful to create an ongoing list of all the ways your body supports you and all the things your body does help you to be, do and have. These are the things that you might take for granted. Yet if you were without them, you would likely be unhappy about it.

When your focus remains anchored in the ways your illness is negatively affecting your life than fear can run wild and your illness can take over your life. It can become bigger than you are if you continue to give it power in this way. It can steel your sense of self and become your new identity. So remember how important it is to steer your awareness towards the things that continue to remind you that you are not your illness.

My Invitation For You:

Create a list of all the things your body is supporting you in doing, being, and having today.

Can you still have coffee?
Can you still have a good night’s sleep?
Can you still be funny?
Can you still be a musician?
Can you still do the gardening that you love?
Can you still chew your food or bend over to tie your shoes?

Acknowledge your body for all the magnificent ways it serves you. This can be a powerful exercise in redirecting your awareness, soothing your fears, and creating a sense of calm and appreciation within you.

Yesterday I found myself deeply moved by a post MJ had written at Rhymes with Migraine. She wrote about the power of unconditional self love and the Superwoman image that often keeps us from experiencing that love. In reading, I wanted to reach through my computer screen, take both of her hands in mine, look her straight in the eyes, and remind her over and over again that there IS a Superwoman inside her dying to be acknowledged and wanting to replace the old and un-evolved version most of us carry around to our demise.

My Superwoman Daze

I used to believe in that same old Superwoman. Until I realized that if I held on to her any longer she would kill me. I knew she would take every last ounce of my self-worth and my ability to love myself if I let her. I had to let her go, but how?

I realized I needed to replace my image of her with something else--Just like I traded in coffee for hot lemon-ginger water. I needed to replace her like I replaced my love for bike riding with tennis, (because I was getting exercise induced migraines on the bike but not on the tennis court.) I needed to revamp my definition of Superwoman and turn it into one that empowered me.

The Real Superwoman

I no longer believe in a Superwoman who does everything perfectly. I believe in a Superwoman who creates opportunity and looks for the positive side when the chips are down. I believe in a Superwoman who understands that the most heroic feat ever is learning to love herself unconditionally and makes it her mission to do so.

A real Superwoman doesn’t just glide through life effortlessly having everything turn out the way she planned. What would be so heroic about that? No, the real Superwoman takes on the BIG challenges in life like facing the uncertainties of illness, maneuvering through the unexpected, seeing her plans flop, and acknowledging her greatness anyway.

The real Superwoman doesn’t beat herself up when her fears tell her it’s appropriate. She’s more powerful than that. She loves herself through times of adversity. She loves herself unconditionally even when she wishes or wants to have done differently than she was capable of in some situations. She values the true perfection that she is and doesn’t equate her true perfection to her completing some “To Do” list. The real Superwoman is never coerced into action by an intense fear of not being good enough.

The Real Superwoman says “no” to the things an un-evolved Superwoman wouldn’t have the courage to say “no” to. She says, “No I will not let anyone else but me decide whether or not I am worthy.” And she says "Yes, I AM worthy!" She says “No, I choose to stay home tonight and get some much needed rest.” The real Superwoman says “no” to the things that do not honor her and “yes” to those things that do, and she knows the difference. The Real Superwoman measures her heroism by how unconditionally loving she can be to herself and those around her.

The Real Superwoman lives within each of us. Some of us may let her lead more than others, but nonetheless, she is there. She is there wanting to be acknowledged and wanting to be the greatest friend to you that you could ever have by your side cheering you on. Love her and she will love you back like you have never been loved before. And because every Superwoman needs an anthem to remind them of who they are—here you go Superwomen…turn this one up!

Illness will always let us know what we must do and who we will need to become in order to persevere, and yes—even triumph. The following are what I call “Rising Star Qualities.” They are the personal qualities that will help you breakthrough your fears and safely guide you towards living beyond your illness.

*Vision Driven people become creative and innovative problem solvers. When you are vision driven you tend to feel unstoppable. You clearly understand your values and align them with your vision for living beyond illness. Your vision guides you in all that you do. You live and act intentionally. Being vision driven gives you energy when you are exhausted, motivation when fear tries to dissuade you, and purpose that makes you pick yourself up, brush yourself off, find the opportunity, and jump back in the game again and again.

*Self-Aware people make proactive choices that align with their higher self and not their inner gremlins—and they know the difference. Self-aware people think and feel before they act. They are in tune with themselves—their mind, body and spirit. They know that the most important relationship in life is the one they have with themselves. They don’t run away from their fears nor do they reject themselves for experiencing fear. When you become self-aware you understand who you are and who you need to become in order to live beyond illness and create the life you want to be living.

*Daring people think outside of the box and refuse to be put in a corner that doesn’t suit them. They give themselves permission to create the life they want to live. When you are daring you ask for a second opinion, you risk being heard and seen, and you don’t bow down to fear. Being daring is about being true to yourself and true to your vision for living beyond your illness. You dare to ask questions and listen to your intuition. You question processes, authority, and solutions that don’t resonate with you. Daring people explore new arenas with an open mind and a willingness to venture into the unknown trusting themselves and honoring their inner voice.

*Opportunistic people create purpose, generate positive outcomes and experience gratitude in life’s unexpected happenings. Being Opportunistic is about using your mind to empower yourself so that your fears don’t lead you into unsavory territories stealing your drive and focus. When you are opportunistic you direct your imagination towards positive possibilities—always looking for the gold nugget in your experiences. You allow yourself to be lead by the belief that what you need in any given moment is always right in front of you. As a result, you tend to find it!

*Shameless people don’t rely on others to acknowledge their worthiness before they are willing to honor themselves and take actions accordingly. There isn’t a greater need for this quality than for someone facing illness. Those who choose to be shameless know that shame is a deadly emotion that will keep them from living beyond illness. When you are shameless you don’t get lost in feelings of embarrassment, unworthiness, or regret. You look for the humor and the humanity in all experiences. Best of all, being shameless affords you the luxury of loving yourself unconditionally. It’s this kind of self love that fuels your ability and willingness to live beyond illness.

*Accountable people take responsibility for those things within their control and not outside their control--and they know how to make that distinction. They take responsibility for their lives today and the lives they want to create. They take decisive action and spend little to no time making excuses because they’d rather be moving forward and onward. When you are accountable you set the record straight, own your strengths and weaknesses, learn from your mistakes, and draw new strength and commitment from all of it! You spend very little time feeding regret or hanging out in the past. You know that living in the past and getting lost in regret is like heading in the opposite direction of living beyond their illness.

*Forgiving people don’t clutter their path with shame, blame, complaints, excuses and scapegoats. Forgiving people recognize the burden and toxicity of un-forgiveness. They know that forgiveness keeps them focused on their vision and on course towards living beyond illness. Forgiveness is about letting go of everything that keeps your fears alive. It’s about clearing a space for forward action, peace and wellness. When you are forgiving you forgive yourself, those who have done you wrong, your body, your illness, God—all of it. Forgiveness keeps you in the present, lightens your load, and propels you without restriction towards the life you want to be living.

*Compassionate people recognize the value, beauty, and humanity of all people. Compassion is the single most important ingredient in creating an allied force between you and your body. Being compassionate is about holding a gentle and kind space for humanity—yours and mine. Compassionate people know how to practice self care, take care of others, and maintain a balance. Compassion will soothe your woes, speak to your greatness, honor your needs, and never utter the words that you are not enough. When you access compassion you nurture yourself joyfully, not reluctantly. Compassion opens the door to creating greater intimacy with yourself and others.

*Positive people believe in themselves, their vision, their strengths and their greatness. Being positive is about refusing to see the glass half full. You search for the possibilities instead of the problems. When you are positive you meet new challenges with willingness, tenacity, faith and an open mind. You embrace being a novice as a necessary means to becoming a champion in living beyond your illness. You acknowledge both roles (novice and champion), as honorable. You find gratitude within your ups and your downs and set a tone for appreciation in all that you do.

*Resourceful people dare to reach out, ask for support, make new connections and create a wellness team that helps them thrive. Being resourceful is about finding the answers and support you need to bring your vision to life. Resourceful people believe that most everybody they meet falls into one if not both of two categories: Team players for living beyond their illness or wise council for living beyond their illness. When you are resourceful you know where to go to get your needs met or you know where to go to figure out where to go to get your needs met.

When you’re facing illness It’s easy to get caught up in the fears of what the future might hold. But if you spend too much time fearing for your future you’ll find that there is very little of you living in the here and now. Now is the time to be present with all the positive features in your life, enjoying your blessings and triumphs, and planning your future from a place of hope and inspiration.

The Dangers Of “What If?” Thinking:

“What if?” thinking is a dangerous skill that is easy to master. It’s future focused and usually carries a negative slant. The negative slant keeps us from taking positive steps towards bettering our health and creating a sense of well being.

Negative “What if?” thinking is really just a narrow road ending in indecision, inaction, and a feeling of defeat. Negative “What if’s” are fear based imaginings, and possibilities at best—but they are not facts. They are not your current reality. And if you play the negative “what if?” game too long you can start believing in these fears and living your life as if they were facts.

The Benefits Of “What if?” Thinking:

If you really want to practice “What if?” thinking than make sure it works to your advantage. Practice positive “What if?” thinking. “What if the cancer does go away?” “What if I don’t get another migraine this week?” “What if the doctor does call with good news?” You get the idea. Imagine your future unfolding just as you would like it to be. Spend some time in the calm and peace of those thoughts. It will probably become a favorite form of self-care therapy.

It’s really just about deciding where you want to let your mind take you when the mind chooses to drift away from the present moment. Take responsibility for where you let your mind go and how long you let it stay there. And remember that wherever your mind may travel it will likely be supporting your health and sense of well being or harming it.

In the end ALL “What if?” thinking, (positive and negative) has to do with the possibilities of our unknown future. So if you’re going to let your mind imagine something about your future let it be something that empowers you!